The person in question also looks like she’s in her early 20’s. She had a chronic condition where she was basically in a waking coma but wasn’t “experiencing” stuff for a decade so it’s as if time had jumped from her POV because she has no memories of that period.
This gap is so disorienting for her that she identifies her age as 22. Being told her actual birth year causes confusion and distress, as it clashes with her sense of time and personal experience.
People in their 30s hanging out with people in their 20s is normal, jfc
Absolutely. I loved hanging out with older folks when I was younger and hope when I am older some youngsters will spend time with me too. There’s a lot to be gained from spending time with other age groups!
There’s a 12 year gap between 32 and 20.
And?
That’s as long as they’ve been alive!
Yep. The math checks out. So…?
I’m 58 (f). I hang out with a 24-year old (f). We both play the same instrument in the same band, I’m a scientist, she’s studying medicine, we get along, so we do stuff together. Get over it, weirdo.
So? As long as the 2 parties are cool with it, it’s fine.
A lot of my friend group are literally old enough to be my parents, despite me being over 30. Do you call that weird?
Listen, already without your context in the body of the post, no that isn’t creepy or unusual.
Seeing your context, i have to remark;
She had a chronic condition where she was basically in a waking coma but wasn’t “experiencing” stuff for a decade
Wtf? That’s horrifying. Is it sleeping beauty syndrome? I’m terrified of that myself
it’s as if time had jumped from her POV because she has no memories of that period
So why are you asking this question anyway? When you give the reader a prompt of “is it creepy or predatory” it feels like you already want them to choose that answer. Is it someone you’re annoyed with and trying to vent about or are you asking this question because they’re insecure/paranoid of what people will think of them?
By the time you’re in your mid 20’s you stop caring about how old people are. I hang out with older and younger people alike; who they are as a person is far more important than when they were born. I stopped keeping track of my own age by my late 20’s, and now I have to do quick mental math every time someone asks me how old I am.
Now, I don’t have a weird condition that makes my mental age the equivalent of someone in their 20’s, but I imagine that someone who did would have all the more reason to want to hang out with similar-minded people. The real question that should be asked is why do you think it makes so much of a difference when everyone is well into adulthood, even by self-proclaimed mental age?
20 year olds are adults, there is no problem in regards to that. What the hell is this waking coma you’re talking about?
This is copypasta, I saw it on Lemmy already several weeks ago
Not necessarily weird. I’m part of social groups where the youngest are in their mid or early 20s and the oldest are in their 70s or early 80s. If there are common interests it can work. Though I do get why this can be side-eyed if the older parties exclusively only hang around younger people.
A question only a young person would ask. After you become an adult, it’s not creepy to hang out with other adults. Before you’re an adult is when you give a shit about other people’s ages, because it matter.
I think it’s fine. A 22 year old hanging out with 12 year olds is weird. A 42 year old hanging out with 32 year olds is nothing.
I guess there’s some cutoff point where it starts getting icky. Someone should write an equation.
I’ve always heard (age/2) + 7 as a minimum for dating, but agree with platonic sentiments. I’m friends with someone who’s almost 60, he’s almost twice my age
I was friends with an 81 year old at 27. I’m sure she occasionally smiled to herself about my comparative immaturity (though she probably considered it youthfulness) and we wouldn’t have been a good match for a romantic relationship or a business partnership, but that’s fine for normal friends.
This place needs to get a hold of these users making the same weird questions over and over. Same again questions about age gaps, or glaringly obvious inappropriate sexual situations.
There’s a few repeat users ands it’s becoming inane. Its making a mockery of the forum and it’s either clearly trolls, unhinged people or software.
No.
I’m in my 50s and regularly hang out with people in their 20s because that’s my kids age and he invites us over for house parties. LOL.
Some times they really like stories about ye’ olden times… Like the time I went to Shelbyville to get a new heel for m’ shoe. I had an onion tied to my belt, such was the style at the time…
Oh my god, you hang out with people your kids’ ages ‽ They’re as old as your children
/s
What can I say? He and his wife throw great parties… He’ll be 30 this year though so we’ll see where that goes!
Adults are adults. As long as no one was groomed from teenagers or power/authority issues. Adults can be friends with whatever other adults they want.
There isn’t a lot of difference between a 22 and someone in their 30s, personality wise. People usually become a bit less impulsive, a bit more respectful of others, and overall they have less energy and more responsibilities so this tones down any activities like clubbing or whatever. But the change is small. To throw some numbers out of my arse, if you are at 100% in your early 20s then you are probably operating at 80% during your 30s.
But the personality doesn’t change. If someone is particularly childish they may continue to be so and will naturally gravitate towards similar people. Sometimes life places you in a younger crowd; I’ve returned to study in my early 30s and most of my classmates were in their early 20s. Yes we hung out together. Nobody had a problem with my age and I didn’t have a problem with theirs.
I find that what you have going on in life is more important than your age when it comes to relating to other people. I am single. I’ve met some really nice people while studying who were my age or older, and they had families to take care of. It’s a different game. They have less time available, and it’s easier for them to relate to others in a similar life stage.
You say this person missed out on their early 20s and that’s perfectly understandable as a reason to want to stick with younger people. Like I said, you mingle with people in a similar life stage.
So no it’s not necessarily creepy to stick with a much younger crowd than yourself.
Now, if you are getting creepy vibes from this person, pay attention, because they may very well be a creep. Are they stalking others in the group? Manipulating them? Are they being too lewd or inappropriate in some way? Are they doing things that put the safety of others at risk? What’s bothering you, other than the age?
Nothing wrong with hanging out with people that are a different age to you.
I was part of a board game group where the ages ranged from 20 through to 45.
As someone who was ‘offline’ a month with memory issues caused by this and having a jumbled mess for a year I can relate somehow.
I do not at all think (as a base) that is predatory and the person really has a lot to deal with which is not easy at all and needs all the support she can get. She needs to find back into life.
