Respectfully, no thanks

Elfriede

I am beyond the point in my life
Where I am trying to save
An emotionally unavailable
Avoidant man

The story of the misunderstood, sensitive softboi
The story of the emotionally unavailable man
With fear of intimacy
And commitment issues
Who will eventually reveal their lovable golden core
As old as time
So old
My ears bleed from it
It’s a fairy tale
Cause all they ever reveal themselves to be
Is self-absorbed assholes

You say women never gave you a chance
To open up and be yourself
While all that time
you apparently expected them
to commit to your terms

But
two people
means two terms,
and a women’s terms are no less of importance than yours.

Maybe they waited patiently
Went in
Round and round again
For negotiation
And drove against walls
And eventually decided,
they had seen enough
You had shown them your terms
And respectfully,
They declined

If you don’t want to get to know me
If you are not interested in meaningful conversation
If you are looking for a good time,
laughter, kisses and good fucks
Then please
Let’s just call it like that
And let’s have some uncomplicated sex
Without all the other awkwardness

But also
without you reaping all the care work
All so eagerly
Without reciprocating

Yet, if in general
I am just too much
A burden
Demanding
Intense
You’re repulsed by me
Being an actual subject
A person
With a character
With needs, emotions and boundaries

Then
Better buy yourself
A pocket pussy
And talk to chatGPT
I heard its programmed for empathy and not giving strong counters
I have seen and tried and waited and
I, respectfully, decline.

Published in Harbour #4 Fall 2025

  • velma@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    5 days ago

    This resonated deeply. Thanks for sharing!

    Reminds me of a song from Courtney Barnett:

    I’m not your mother, I’m not your bitch

    I hear you mutter under your breath

    Put up or shut up, it’s all the same

    It’s all the same, never changes, never changes

    I’m not your mother, I’m not your bitch

    D-did I stutter a little bit?

    Sit down and shut up, it’s all the same

    It’s all the same, never changes, never changes

    I get most defensive

    When I know I’m wrong

    Think we all can agree

    I try my best at being patient

    But I can only put up with so much shit

    I’m not your mother, I’m not your bitch

    I hear you mutter under your breath

    Put up or shut up, it’s all the same

    It’s all the same, never changes, never changes