I dunno if I even wanted to go into that subject.
I’m somewhere between women (at least in England) having incredibly stuck-up attitudes and dating apps being enshittified to the point where they’re more like scams.
I legit get no matches apart from Coffee Meets Bagel and OkCupid.
99% of the profiles curated to me for matching on CMB are East or South East Asian women, and this isn’t me not wanting to date Asian women. IDGAF about ethnicity when it comes to partners. I mean I’d rather not be used as the means to a spousal visa by someone who isn’t even in the same continent. I met a previous ex on there, and she just wanted to use me for help learning English.
OkCupid is even worse. I get a lot of matches but it’s all GPS spoofing SE-Asian and African women. Some are legit, many try to lull me into a crypto scam or ask me to Venmo them money for a passport application.
Part of the reason I got into my current hobby (singing, karaoke) was to meet people outside of apps. Apart from someone making out with me once, it’s only otherwise led to gay men hitting on me.
I think about the good things that people do and are capable of doing, yet despite this the world seems like an irredeemable shithole and that we are living under a kakistocracy. I’m not saying any particular nation, but the overall trend across the world.
To use a simple example: there isn’t even one single nation that has banned factory farming. My comment isn’t specifically about animal ag, just that this was something that readily came to mind.
We (as a species) could do so much good, yet we are squandering it for the sake of greed, religion, hatred, spitefulness, or whatever else is driving people to be shitty.
After years of writing many dozens of job applications, and many grueling interviews, some of them in other countries, at long last I’ve scored my dream job, in my dream city.
Several months into this, my partner at the time fell seriously ill, and I had to go job-hunting and eventually uproot again, just to take care of her. All dreams of moving in together, into one of the most beautiful places on Earth, and live there until death do us part were gone.
Not to mention that I went from having the greatest boss you could ever imagine to the worst I’ve ever had, by far.
And it was all for nothing, as a year later, after she had recovered, the relationship fell apart anyway.How unattractive the world has been making me feel. Haven’t matched with anyone legit on a dating app for nearly a year. And I feel like whenever I open up about it (especially on Reddit) I get so much hostility and vitriol.
That’s fucked. Dating apps are pretty much a universally bad time, and it can really suck the soul out of you. Good luck to you.
They’re designed to keep you single. If you’re in a relationship, you probably don’t need a dating app. Ditch the apps.
It’s more personal rather than the many problems of the world, but my dad didn’t pass on the inheritance my grandparents promised me, around $100k. This was about five years ago. Housing has gone up so much during that time that it’s no longer enough to at least get me into a mortgage. FWIW, My grandparents bought his property and paid for the house to be built on it.
Wow. If my dad did that I’d think he was a piece of shit forever and just erase him from my life. Your grandparents could have avoided this if they had put that money in a trust for you.
I even told my grandparents he would do this.
I completelly just missed out on an era, seggregated to my room. Like, I didn’t get to hop on the Nintendo era craze and experience it while it was relevant, parties, everything wasted. Now literally everything that was familiar is dead or corrupted.
Today’s generations will never get to experience the things that I did: No calm days watching cartoons under your blanket, playing outside, fun toys, everything is enshitified, no hope for the future, institutions actively hate them and want them dead.
I guess I’m in the same place as 10 years ago, but with a job. Need to prep people for the worst.
Honestly, my cats. One of them has an enlarged heart and I worry she’s on her last legs. Shes 18. So shes no spring chicken. I just worry she’s going to die soon :(
She and her bro are my life. I have no friends and no family. I just sit at home all day. Do my cats are vey special to me. They are my reason for living. I’m sure my younger cat would find a new home, but my old lass would die at the shelter if I died :/
Balding
Make hats popular again
I live in an area completely overtaken by data center construction. The environmental devastation all around me is deeply saddening. Add to that the main purpose is to put people out of work and to make it so people don’t have to think for themselves and it really feels like doomsday or something out of a Stanislaw Lem novel.
Do you have the ability to relocate? Not everyone can, but it’s worth considering if you have the option.
It would not be easy. This is family land going back over 200 years. There are also aging parents to care for who will never leave. We are still thinking about it though.
I’m really sorry. I can’t imagine the helplessness of watching that happen around you.
Thank you. It is a nightmare.
Would vandalism help your mental health?
I guess the people close to me know that losing my cat in January was a way bigger deal for me than I’ve talked about.
Just writing this, thinking about how I miss him, I can feel the emotion building up. 🥴
I’m so sorry. Losing a cat sucks. :(
It’s been a few weeks for me. His ashes just came back yesterday and it’s been hard.
If you haven’t gotten one already, brace for late condolences cards from places like your vet or animal hospital.
Those were hard on us when we got them weeks later.
Photo albums with the “1 year ago…” reminder/notifications and showing photos of the deceased. Hit like a punch straight to the gut.
🫂 take this hug from an internet stranger. Also take a look at the other comment I posted, I don’t know if it’ll help you cause its so soon, but I hope it can.
Damn. I wish you and I were sat together somewhere quiet sharing photos and stories right now.
I lost my sweet void a few years ago, and it still hurts when I think about her, but the pain is much more manageable that it was.
Hang in there friend, it won’t always be this hard.
Thank you.
I may even have more cats in the future, but it’ll never be the same. He meant so much to me, a once in a lifetime connection.
Even when it gets easier I wouldn’t want it to ever feel totally okay that he’s not here. 🥰
You’re welcome, and it sounds like you’re in the right headspace. Each kitty is their own special point in your life, and no kitty can replace another.
If it helps you any, in the last year I got a new void after mine died about 4 years ago this summer. I love my new little void, but I still cry over my former void. The hurt is still there, but bearable… most of the time anyways.
Take care
I feel you
Im sorry. I know how you feel, but I want you to know it gets better. You still miss them but you think of all the happy times, the times when they fetched a toy or meowed in a funny way. You think of how they had a forever home and a good life with you, no matter how long or short.
Drat I think some onion ninjas snuck in while I was writing…
🥰
Thank you.
Its a tough time but not disabling, it’s confusing but mostly I feel the love and the sadness together.
Yeah it’s the combination that really gets you. I’m glad I could help. :3
Maybe you have the space to foster, I funnelled the grief from losing my gorgeous cat, towards caring for sick kittens so they could be adopted.
I love this idea. It makes so much sense.
I suspect and fear the inevitable “foster fail” when I inevitably fall in love again.
Yeah, I had foster fails, I’m looking at their fluffy butts right now. It doesn’t hurt as much to give them back to be adopted, when that feeling is compared to the pain of the grief you feel. And it does feel very nice to funnel that grief into something very positive.
🥰
I don’t think there’s any possibility of a good future. I’m an engineer and have worked in some high fields on some crazy stuff. I’ve watched millions of dollars just disappear in an instant, many times over. All completely unnecessary. This was hardware a decade ago. Now there’s 10x that going into software. Homelessness, hunger, poverty, across the globe, could have been eliminated a long time ago.
Homelessness, hunger, poverty, across the globe, could have been eliminated a long time ago.
My (top-level) comment touches on this. Our species has the capabilities to do immense good, yet we have thoroughly squandered it to satisfy the greed of a few.
My cousin’s been missing for a few years. Does not want to be found. Had mild paranoia as a kid, turned to an artistic career, used cannabis excessively to manage symptoms and workload, and it just excarbated her paranoia. Went off the deep-end, did not attend her dad’s funeral. Reached out to her several times, no contact. We grew up as twins almost.
All the fucking animals are dying and we just keep making everything worse to make a handful of people obscenely wealthy.
Yeah but nothing else matters except the Epstein class getting richer. Because having billions upon billions is not enough for some reason.
It was never about the money, it was just a convenient way to ensure the lower classes got only the absolute minimum of what they needed to be useful, even if it cost them some comfort.
You’re pretty smart for the world’s dumbest man
I may have jumped the gun when I made the username, as I’m actually genuinely disabled.
Me too! Disabled high five!
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When my wife and I were first married, my dad would ask us when we were going to have kids every time he visited.
At first we would tell him we didn’t know. Then after hearing the question a few dozen times, we started saying we decided not to have any kids.
For context, I’m the youngest in my family and he already had three granddaughters from my older brother and sister. My wife is the youngest in her family and her parents had no grandchildren (her oldest brother was killed by a drunk driver, and the other brother was a dickhead and his first wife was too smart to have kids with him). I know it was absolutely torturing her parents to hear us say we weren’t having kids.
We did have kids (three), but we did it on our schedule.
You might decide to have kids someday. You might not.
In your situation, I’d make up a story to explain why there were no kids that would embarrass them into never asking again. Or…if you can pull it off…just start crying and run off.
“I think one of us might be sterile or something. I keep peeing in her butt like they told me at school and she’s still not pregnant.”
I try not to. It’s so easy to allow myself to reflect on the fucking horrors of the world, but I know it doesn’t do any good.
I think one of the general things that gets me down is the absence of genuine truth in the media and in government. In some parts of the world bribery, corruption and greed are commonplace, but we were brought up in the West to believe that as a society we’re somehow more noble and honest. That there’s accountability and due process and controls in place that stop cronyism, and that the law is there to protect us from harm and injustice.
Of course, you just have to scratch the surface to see that it’s all a lie - it’s always been about money, greed and self-interest at the top, and so it remains.
So you got married when you were 20 and he was 40? Is that normal?
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My area has so many endemic and/or threatened invertebrates, and who knows how many have gone extinct. But no one cares. The land is clear cut and treated like shit while streams are dumping grounds. I wonder how much longer until it is all sterile.
